All We Need Is Love

all you need is love . tiara. cookie border

LOVE

Women need a tribe because we crave those who will listen to, support, and encourage us. We do those things for many other people, and sometimes we become resentful if we aren’t allowed the same privilege.

 

There’s freedom and strength in having friends who listen to you, allow you to voice your dreams without stifling them, and encourage you to be your best–whatever that looks like. If you don’t have a group of friends, or at least one special friend, I encourage you to seek out people you relate to, who share your spark and interests, and who will honor and treasure you. Perhaps you will find these friends in an online group, a club friendship, or co-workers. I found a tribe like this in an online group called Women On Fire. I also love the Women 2 Women community and have found my tribe here. Finding your tribe takes being open to making friends, cultivating relationships, and seeking ways to meet other women of like mind and heart. If you are determined to find your tribe, you will.

 

A TIARA

You are fabulous!! Don’t believe it? Maybe you should change your self-view.  For you to be your most authentic and confident self, you need to love and value the person you are. Take inventory of and celebrate your strengths and skills (ask a friend for help if needed). Declare yourself amazing and delightful and strong! Make life happen for you. Remember, although you are a queen worthy of a crown, you are also a warrior woman with killer stompin’ boots.

 

and  A COOKIE…

So eat the cookie, already. Buy those flowers, soak in the tub, and take a nap! Women are characteristically nurturing souls. But who nurtures us? Most likely no one. It’s up to us to nurture ourselves and that means self-care; giving yourself permission to do the little things that restore your joy, your health, and your energy.

Here’s to living your life so that your sparkle shines for the entire world to see.

 

 

As a contributing writer to the Women 2 Women Michigan magazine, I wrote this for my “Sparkle & Shine” column in their first 2017 issue. You can read the whole issue for free here. You will most likely enjoy the magazine because it’s full of great articles and information for, about, and by women. 

You can buy the “Tiara” card shown above here. I enjoy giving it as a neat gift for a friend. Here’s how:
In a cute gift bag place the card, a Dollar Store tiara (from the kids’ party section), and a shrink-wrapped cookie (the kind you find at Starbucks).

Here’s what you say on the card:

“You’ll always have my love, you were born to wear a tiara, and here’s your cookie.”

Or something like that. This gift has made many women smile!

 

Enjoy your week, my friends!

Love and sparkle hugs,

Passionista Mimi

Do You Love Your Child “Every Single Bit”?

I designed this card to express how I feel about my children. How about saying these words to your own children? Help them feel like precious treasures. Because when children know that they are amazing and wonderful and CHERISHED, they have a healthy foundation for self-love and courage, and know that they have a safe place supporting them. 

 

On the other hand, please don’t let your child hear that they were a surprise, or a mistake, or an “oopsie”. Those words can damage for life. If you were blessed with a child, however that happened, they are a treasure to be cherished. 

 

Am I always diligent about letting my children know I love them, every single bit? No, of course not! I make mistakes, lose my temper, say things I shouldn’t. But I really try. I want them to know the gift they are to me.

 

Side note: Does that mean always sacrificing MY needs for theirs? No. I believe that always making them a priority, even over my own needs, teaches entitlement and expectation that the world will revolve around them, which we all know is not true. I model healthy self-love by taking time for myself and doing things that help replenish my spirit and restore my brain so I CAN take care of them better. 

 

So, my friends, won’t you join with me in telling your children that you love them, “every single bit”?

 

(You can buy this card in my Etsy shop or click on the image to go directly.)

Have a great day, folks!!

Hugs and sparkles, Mimi

I’m An Overcomer

youre-an-overcomer-black

Having children with special needs is such a challenge! But one thing I’ve learned….it keeps us TOTALLY dependent on God. No way can I be “in control” because in the blink of an eye, our life could be in shambles.

 

There are days my prayer has been, “Oh God, oh God, oh God” because I just didn’t have words. Didn’t have energy to formulate words. It was all I could do to breathe and take care of my children (I am their only parent). Some weeks (months) every.single.day is a challenge. Like pushing a locomotive up a steep mountain.

Motherhood

And then, thank God, we will get a reprieve and I can at last take a deep breath. And I just sit. And sit. And let God fill my mind, body, and breath. And He brings healing to my emotions.

 

Because there is no doubt about how emotionally draining it is to watch your child hurt, or be disappointed because of physical limitations, or become emotionally so out-of-sorts that all day is a battle.

 

Or how physically and emotionally exhausting it is to be making hard, frustrating, impossible decisions for the duration of several days.

 

Sleep-deprived, worry-filled, and constantly searching for solutions can totally wring a person out!

I can rack

But oh, God is able! The video below is amazing and so uplifting. 

 

Mandisa sings her song Overcomer with clips of people who have overcome some extreme physical challenges.

 

I equate the physical with our mental and emotional challenges. It’s not an easy journey (Wait, what? It’s gonna be hard? Hey, I didn’t sign up for that!!!) But a journey that I hope will bring God glory. Because the glory is all His.

 

Anything that I’ve accomplished with my children has been while He was holding my hand, speaking into my spirit (sometimes I didn’t want to hear Him–la la la la la!), and guiding my every move. Because I was useless. Incapacitated.

In spite of that, and because of Him, my children are amazing miracles. But that’s a story for another time. Enjoy the video. You will be hooked!

Thank you so much for stopping by. YOU are the reason I write. 

Be kind and share with someone who could use this.  🙂

Love and sparkly hugs,

Mimi

I’ll Love You Forever

One year.

One year since I kissed you goodbye

and watched you leave us.

My heart hurts in missing you.

My arms long to hug you.

My soul needs to talk with you.

I love you with all my heart, sweet sister.

mindy-and-me2

 

Your leaving taught me two very important things:
1) To celebrate myself.

To wear the crazy tiara, or as you did, hot pink leathers, and be a biker babe–or whatever I want to.

To have fun, party now,

and do not worry about what others think.

To enjoy that I am just a bit different

from most people.

Life is very, very short,

and it really doesn’t matter what others think.

It’s MY life, and I’m going to live it to the fullest!

mindy-and-me-christmas-2014


2) To love even more fiercely than I do.

To speak even more truthfully.

To stand firm and not waver in the face of obstacles.

Because, I only have a short time to make an impact on people’s lives.

I’ve gotta get my truth out there!

mindy2

Thank you for being an example and teaching me important things. 

I’ll miss you until the day I see you again, little sis.

You have my heart. Your big sister.

Going! Going! Gone?

You didn’t sign up for my blog to receive news about my Empowordment Cards, but because positive self image and encouraging others is my THING, these cards are a part of ME. Sooooo….

I won’t do a bazillion posts about them. BUT….

I have put a bunch of cards on 50% off sale, and I thought you might want to know.

make-it-happen-2

Some of these designs are the first ones I created TWO years ago! And while I love them–they are like my babies, after all–I need to make room for some new designs. Sixty-three cards is a lot to manage, especially when they decide to throw a party behind my back! And let’s not talk about carrying them around when I do shows and such! Ugh! Can we say weighsalot?

Believe

This is a great time to stock up on cards for the year. I mean, where can you purchase a colorful, unique, glossy, heavy-weight, Mimi-designed 5×7 greeting card for $1.50? These are works of art, people. Well, some folks think so!

I mean they are all the rage in NYC!!

 

I have cards on sale that are fitting for birthday,

 

you-are-something-else

birthday-cover

 

graduation,

 think-live-believe-big

wow-you-did-it

Valentine’s and Sweetest Day or anniversary,

You make my heart dance2

heart-explosion-drawing-e1390489037408

celebrations,

the-more-you-praise-and-celebrate-life

today-i-will-choose-joy

and just plain ol’ encouragement.

youre-an-overcomer-black youve-got-this

Take a walk on the wild side and browse on over at my shop to choose the ones you want to stock up on.

NOTICE: once they are out of stock, they are gone! Unless you want to order a 10-pack and then I’d be happy to re-order you some. 🙂

Thanks for letting me pitch a sale in your inbox. 🙂

 

Click right HERE to gain entrance to the much-coveted SALE section of my Etsy shop.

Shhhhh, you are the first to get a shot at it. But tomorrow I’m tellin’ the WORLD!!

 

And thank you soooo much for being my READERS!! I can’t even tell you what it means!

Love and really big sparkly HUGs to you,

Mimi

P.S. My watermark (logo) does not appear on the front of the cards you buy. It’s just for copyright purposes that it’s on them here.

 

Tell Your Mama!

Has your mama been a shining light in YOUR life?

Has she guided you through

life’s tumultuous waves

and almost-drowning experiences?

 

and so she lit the way
Did she stretch out her hand for you to hold when fear made you tremble?
And open her arms widely

to receive and envelop you

when you were broken-hearted?

Did your mother support you

and encourage you to do that something scary

 that you really wanted to do?


you are absolutely fabulous

Did she clap wildly and smile widely

when you reached those difficult-to-achieve goals?

And thoroughly discuss the pros and cons of a challenging decision?

Did she show you how to live life,
and model unconditional love so you’d be able to?

You are amazing with a side of sprinkles

Then TELL her!

Mother’s Day is one of  the most important times

to give her a card, folks.

And WRITE in it all of your appreciation.

In your own handwriting, tell her thank you.

Tell her how much you love her (like she tells you).

Her heart was more tender

She will KEEP your cards

to read over and over.

 

And you will find them stored together

after she is gone. 

Why? Because she loves you

and your words matter.

 

Take it from a mama who knows.

 

Wishing those of you who are,

a Happy Mother’s Day!

Love and great, big hugs,

Passionista Mimi

 

P.S. If you are a bit word challenged, there is no shame in using someone else’s.

You can always search online for words to use.

Buy one of my Empowordment cards to get you started, then write a bit inside. 

You can do it, and your mama will be so happy!

Self-Care Is Love

self care is love 2

We put everyone and everything else first, at the expense of our health and spirit. Society has programmed us that way. Stop listening to the lies. You are enough already. MORE than enough.

 

You do not have to earn your way or work to deserve love (I learned this way too late in life) and there is nothing to prove.

 

You are amazing and capable and wonderful just the way you are.

 

Your job will be there (asking more and more).

 

Your house will be dirty anyway. Ask for help. Have a family meeting.

State your purpose and reason for taking some self time.

 

And KNOW that you don’t have to do it all.

 

At work, do a quality job, but don’t sacrifice your health and family and creative outlets to try and satisfy unrealistic demands and standards.

 

Respect yourself and others will too.

 

Darlin’, GO for that walk, to art class, out with friends, to yoga.

Take a long bath.

Paint, draw, color, shape, mold, sew, dig–whatever fills your creative spirit.

Say “no” more.

Give yourself space to breathe.

 

When we love ourselves, we love everyone else better.

That is all there is to it!!

 

By the way, I love you. (And I’m going to go do some stretches. Yay me!)

Thanks for visiting.

Love and hugs, Passionista

This is Your Brain. This is Your Brain in Love.

heart-explosion-drawing-e1390489037408

Can you imagine, and perhaps you really can, what it is like to experience that first, heart-exploding realization that someone actually loves you completely? Loves you without boundaries or restraint, regardless of your brokenness, emotional issues, and the truckloads of psychological stuff you carry with you? It is addictive to say the least.

 

Your mind returns again and again to thoughts of that person who loves you so unconditionally. Why? Because it feels marvelous. The endorphin rush you feel each time you realize that someone can actually love YOU (and all your quirkiness, your faults, and your issues that seem to make you relationally dysfunctional) is likened to that of a chemical rush to your brain.

 

Unconditional love is just that, no conditions attached. You are loved just because you are YOU. Not what you do. Not because of how good you are or how you look or sound or smell. Just because you are that amazing and unique package of YOU. Someone finds delight in the person of you. That is heady stuff…and you want more.

You make my heart dance2

 

I am blessed to have experienced this. For the first time in my life, no matter how weird I got, or dysfunctional, or disappointing I was, I was loved completely. This person didn’t see a need to change or reform me, to control my loud, hyper personality, my neediness, or insecurity. In fact, just the opposite happened. My new love actually celebrated and enjoyed the real me, told me wonderful things about myself I had not realized. And so, I became……addicted.

 

We have heard the phrases “addicted to love” and “love addiction”, and come to find out there is scientific truth to them. According to results found in a study done in 2000,

” The f(functional)MRI study also discovered that the part of brain associated with addiction was activated when participants were viewing pictures of the people they were in love with. This area is comprised of a very high concentration of dopamine receptors, a neurotransmitter which, among other things, is related to addiction. And certainly it is true that love and addiction bear some important similarities.”

See more here.

(The article goes on to speak about obsessive compulsion and acting a bit batty, but I’m trying to ignore those.)

This kind of love and acceptance brings a dopamine rush and can be full-out addicting! Love is indeed a wonderful “feel good” drug!

 

I’ve always been afraid to be completely real, somehow feeling that I wouldn’t be liked for who I really am. I’m pretty sure I became a people-pleaser while still in the womb, but that is a story for later. So when I was fully and completely accepted, with joy no less, it was a wonderful and beautiful balm to my wounded spirit. A balm that began to heal and nourish and “give my heart wings” enough to venture out of my self-imposed survival mode (which felt very much like a box). The fear of what others would think about me, how they would regard my true personality, began to fall away in the face of such acceptance and enjoyment of me.

You are something else

We are told that God has this kind of love for us but it’s hard to conceive if we’ve never experienced it. However, to receive unconditional love from a person, with skin on, someone we see, talk with and touch, gives us a much clearer picture of His love for us.

 

(Sidenote: Aside from romantic love, your unconditional love for people in your life can transform them. You can love unconditionally, celebrate uniqueness, and love the person for who they are, and no other reason. You can set someone’s heart free and give them the gift of believing in themselves.) 

 

I hope that if you haven’t yet, you will experience this kind of unconditional love. We all deserve it. I didn’t think I did. I settled for the other kind. It hurt. It stifled. It closed me up. But this kind of love? This love set me free.

flight-poem - Copy

 

Do yourself and others a favor. Practice unconditional love. Your own life will be richer for it. 

 

Thanks for stopping by. I’d love it if you’d share. And leave a comment, would you please? I never know if anyone reads my posts. 🙂

Until next time, 

Hugs and love, Passionista

What IS a BOX anyway?

We shouldn't let others BOX us in.“Thinking outside the box.” “Living outside the box.”

We hear these phrases all the time.

And so I ask you, WHAT is a BOX?

As a well-practiced People Pleaser, I do believe I was living inside a box of other people’s expectations, their opinions of me, their considerations of what was a worthy pursuit for my life, their molding of my behaviors, and what were acceptable expressions of who I am.

I truly had to shake off the binders and chains in order to break out of my box.

For a taste of what my FREEDOM looks like see Girls Can.

I know that God created me to be THIS person…who I am able to be (have allowed myself to be) now. Perhaps it’s age and wisdom. Maybe I just got too tired to try to be everyone’s opinion of me.

Or perhaps it was finally realizing my worth.

I did come to learn that when we allow others to “box us in” our experiences are boxed in too. We are bound by other’s opinions especially if we allow them to dictate the choices we make. I do not refer to consulting people of wisdom. I need others in my life who will help me consider options. But I do not need those who will think less of me if I don’t follow their advice.

I am a very opinionated person. I truly desire that my opinions come from a heart of love and compassion and a spirit that seeks after God. (I cannot stand cruelty, evil, injustice, and the horrid things humans do to other humans.)

I have been criticized. And I will continue to be, because I don’t neccessarily fit the box of a “typical” American God-follower. (I spent a lot of time writing and praying before I pushed the “publish” button on my last post as I do with every post. It’s a huge responsibility and risk to put my words and opinions out into cyber space forever!)  However I try to seek God with all my heart, show love and compassion, and harm no one. If my way of being “Jesus with skin on” is different from yours and you don’t like it, well, it’s not my intention to offend. But Jesus offended many with His choices.

I would encourage you to learn to know your own self. To BE your own self. And not let the outside opinions, society, media, and sometimes even family, dissuade you from choosing to honor who you were created to be. I lost a lot of years of my life with my light hidden. I decided the world was missing out and I was incomplete and dying on the vine. So now I choose life!

this huge brilliant spectacular light of mine

Oh. And that BOX? It was flattened quite a while ago!

 

Have a wonderful week of self-discovery folks! And thank you so much for hanging in here with me.

Passionista Mimi

 

 

It’s Not You, It’s Me~Guest post

I read a wonderful blog post today

from Vanessa of At The Picket Fence.

About insecurity.

I believe it’s at the heart of many damaging behaviors–

which most surely become weapons,

cutting to the very heart and soul.

My own insecurity led to attention-seeking behaviors….

people pleasing….and very “loud” body language

(because I wasn’t permitted to voice negative emotions,

and besides I might offend someone and then they would be mad at me–heaven forbid!)

Insecurity seeps into our lives because of many reasons, but I’d say the key issue is the feeling of “not good enough”.

Which leads us to lash out in anger.

To manipulate.

Seek to establish control.

To strive to please.

To engage in self-defeating behaviors.

Things I’ve worked hard to remove from my life.

 

My “ah-ha” moment came years ago when I realized that the only person I needed to please was God. He alone had the purest love and intentions for me. Humans all have an agenda, realized or not. We perceive and receive others through that filtered agenda. Bottom line?

Our belief programs our behavior!

 

what we believe is how we behave

 

When I let go of others’ opinions and focused on my behaviors, I began the journey to freedom. Not without setbacks and “playing those old tapes” which programmed unhealthy behaviors, but definitely toward emotional healing!

 

I have learned that my only competition is myself and my focus is now on changing for the better, every day if possible.

 

The only person

 

We really can’t change people unless they decide to change themselves. Sometimes our own positive, accepting behaviors toward them will encourage that change. But if it doesn’t, we still have a choice, as Vanessa states.

 

imagine-our-world 2

 

Choose wisely, my friends, for we hold

the power of life and death in our words and deeds.

 

Read the whole post Vanessa wrote. She states it perfectly.

Thank you Vanessa, for your inspiring words today!

 

Rock your world, peeps!!

Hugs and love, Passionista

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