Life Ain’t Always Sunshine and Roses

So here’s the deal.

It’s NOT always sparkle and shine in my life.

There are days like this week when I am burdened for a precious friend and feel helpless in the situation. When I am a bit tired of working, parenting alone, being this age with kids, being indoors, wanting something fun, loneliness, just the keeping on keeping on.

And there are some days when the only prayer I can form is, “Oh God, oh God, oh God!”

That is the real truth, folks. I get in those places too.

I thought maybe you should know.

I never want you to feel as if I downplay your pain. Or suggest that your difficult situation can just go away “poof”.

But I post the positive things I do because SOMEONE needs to read them.

And in my inner spirit those things are ME. They are what I do to keep doing.

I smile, I pray, I spend time being thankful, I reach out to others, I help others if at all possible….

All these things help to center me and bring the “yuck” back into perspective.

I do know that when we fill our brains with positive thoughts,

we attract more positive energy to ourselves.

And that is what being thankful is about.

That is what “speaking to the mountain” (see previous post) is about.

We actually DO have a choice in how we spend our focus/energy.

And when I’m in a funk, I choose to spend mine by rejoicing in all the good I see around me.

Being thankful for the many, many good things in my life.

And realizing that these funks don’t last forever.

Two things I know–God is always faithful, and the sun will eventually shine!

Write Your Own Script, My Dear

So really. Why would you follow in the exact footprints of someone else?

Me saying, “Seriously?”

They do not have YOUR unique qualities, gifts, abilities, and desires, and you don’t have theirs.

Should you fashion your life after what other people say? Should you let what is important to them be what guides you?

Perhaps to some degree, if they are people you love. But when it comes to achieving what you truly desire in life, I believe that you need to be the one to determine what is most important to you.

And please, do not let people’s opinions of you alter your course one bit! Know your own truth.

YOU are the one to determine

the kind of person you want to be.

What you wear, how you talk,

what your goals are,

the things that fulfill your heart,

what kind of job you want,

the kind of a person you want a relationship with,

where you want to live, how you run your home,

what books you read,

how much schooling you obtain……

these should be things of your choosing and should not be dictated by the choices of others.

write-your-own-script

Of course I am not discounting the wise counsel of people. We all need help with decisions and lifestyle issues.

I’m referring to giving up yourself

in order to follow blindly.

Or relinquishing your desires

because someone thinks they are silly.

Or not wearing something you love

because no one else does.

Or not truly honoring your heart and spirit

because others criticize you for it.

You have a brain, emotions, intelligence, reason, values, morals, and common sense.

Use them to figure out, and pursue, what is valuable to you. Mark your own path, and

Write your own script for your life!

As always, I thank you for visiting. I’d love to know what you think!

Love and sparkly hugs,

Passionista

Do Not Apologize For Who You Are!

never-apologize

Oh darling, don’t you know that who you are is the most amazing and fabulous gift to the world? Who you are is full of wonder and possibility. You deserve to be loved and fulfilled in what you do. I know it’s tough many days. I know some of you are not in an ideal situation. I know some of you feel as if the ground is swallowing you up and closing in over you.

 

I know because I’ve been there. And it took action and big steps (in little baby steps) to get me out of that hole. But I am here to tell you that YOU can start today to change your situation. There are people who will help you.

 

Do not try to do it alone. I know, precious one, that you feel as if you must be strong and do this life thing (as hard and unpleasant as it is) by yourself because that’s who you are. Well, you only limit yourself when you limit your possibilities.

 

Start talking to people. Start saying what you want and need. I promise, lightning will not strike you. Start asking for help. Start with someone you trust and get them involved in seeking help you and ways to improve and/or get out of your situation.

 

You are NOT alone! You do not have to suffer in silence. There ARE solutions. I know. I found them.

 

The biggest thing is to start realizing how valuable you are. How much the world needs your special, unique gifts and love. Start telling yourself the TRUTH–that you are amazing and have wonderful abilities and gifts for this world.

 

Start seeking ways to BE who you really are. To pour out your beautiful spirit and shine your gorgeous light.

 

Because darling, you are perfect, just as you are! Never apologize.

 

Love and sparkly hugs! Mimi

I’m An Overcomer

youre-an-overcomer-black

Having children with special needs is such a challenge! But one thing I’ve learned….it keeps us TOTALLY dependent on God. No way can I be “in control” because in the blink of an eye, our life could be in shambles.

 

There are days my prayer has been, “Oh God, oh God, oh God” because I just didn’t have words. Didn’t have energy to formulate words. It was all I could do to breathe and take care of my children (I am their only parent). Some weeks (months) every.single.day is a challenge. Like pushing a locomotive up a steep mountain.

Motherhood

And then, thank God, we will get a reprieve and I can at last take a deep breath. And I just sit. And sit. And let God fill my mind, body, and breath. And He brings healing to my emotions.

 

Because there is no doubt about how emotionally draining it is to watch your child hurt, or be disappointed because of physical limitations, or become emotionally so out-of-sorts that all day is a battle.

 

Or how physically and emotionally exhausting it is to be making hard, frustrating, impossible decisions for the duration of several days.

 

Sleep-deprived, worry-filled, and constantly searching for solutions can totally wring a person out!

I can rack

But oh, God is able! The video below is amazing and so uplifting. 

 

Mandisa sings her song Overcomer with clips of people who have overcome some extreme physical challenges.

 

I equate the physical with our mental and emotional challenges. It’s not an easy journey (Wait, what? It’s gonna be hard? Hey, I didn’t sign up for that!!!) But a journey that I hope will bring God glory. Because the glory is all His.

 

Anything that I’ve accomplished with my children has been while He was holding my hand, speaking into my spirit (sometimes I didn’t want to hear Him–la la la la la!), and guiding my every move. Because I was useless. Incapacitated.

In spite of that, and because of Him, my children are amazing miracles. But that’s a story for another time. Enjoy the video. You will be hooked!

Thank you so much for stopping by. YOU are the reason I write. 

Be kind and share with someone who could use this.  🙂

Love and sparkly hugs,

Mimi

Choosing Joy

today-i-will-choose-joy

“Joy” is one of my favorite words.

Even when life is a disappointment or a trial,

we can still have a consistent joy.

I believe that joy is that which runs deep in our spirit,

and it flows from gratitude and appreciation,

and the ability to recognize and cultivate them.

Sometimes having joy requires

making the choice to take it easy.

Breathe. Enjoy. Relish. I love that word “relish”.

By definition it means…

great appreciation of something,

or enjoyment, gusto, liking, loving, savor, zest, and taste.

I have “great appreciation of”, or relish,  those moments of pure simplicity….

like evenings, or unexpected snow days, at home

with my “treasures” (better known as my kiddos),

birds chirping after a season of cold silence,

that flash when the sun breaks through after long periods of cloudy sameness,

oh, and the first lick of chocolate cake batter from the bowl.

 

 

Perhaps the simple things are the big things in life after all.

Did you know you can teach yourself to recognize them?

Of course, that means being purposeful about it

and being aware.

Looking for those precious moments of pure gift.

Actually seeing everything around you.

 

Yes, there is a lot of ugly.

And yes, it means we can’t be numb,

and when we open ourselves it can sometimes

be the gateway to emotional pain.

But without allowing ourselves to sense and see,

we also delete from our lives the gifts of joy we are given on a daily basis.

slow-down-enjoy-life

Sometimes we have no choice because we are overwhelmed by life.

Many times we do more….we fill our lives with unnecessary busyness,

often trying to please others with agendas that aren’t in our best interest.

I’m learning what matters most to me (what a process!)…

being with my children, conserving my energy so I can be “present” with them

(and learning what “conserving my energy” means, when I used to believe I had a bottomless reserve!),

choosing carefully when to meet with people,

not sacrificing my important priorities because others want me to.

 

Wow, it’s taken a very long time to reach this place!

I used to absolutely run ragged doing all the “shoulds”.

I’m so thankful I have learned to choose (most days).

It’s funny how all the unnecessary stuff begins to fall away

and we are left with the things and

people who matter most.

The people we treasure, the acts that feed our spirits,

and the laughter that connects us and supplies endorphins to keep us going!

I wish for you, my friend, the choicethat you may relish–with JOY–your life and the people who fill it.

Just look at the joy!

Just look at the joy!

 

May you be blessed with JOY and abundance of the simple things in life!

Much love,
Passionista

 

 

 

I’ll Love You Forever

One year.

One year since I kissed you goodbye

and watched you leave us.

My heart hurts in missing you.

My arms long to hug you.

My soul needs to talk with you.

I love you with all my heart, sweet sister.

mindy-and-me2

 

Your leaving taught me two very important things:
1) To celebrate myself.

To wear the crazy tiara, or as you did, hot pink leathers, and be a biker babe–or whatever I want to.

To have fun, party now,

and do not worry about what others think.

To enjoy that I am just a bit different

from most people.

Life is very, very short,

and it really doesn’t matter what others think.

It’s MY life, and I’m going to live it to the fullest!

mindy-and-me-christmas-2014


2) To love even more fiercely than I do.

To speak even more truthfully.

To stand firm and not waver in the face of obstacles.

Because, I only have a short time to make an impact on people’s lives.

I’ve gotta get my truth out there!

mindy2

Thank you for being an example and teaching me important things. 

I’ll miss you until the day I see you again, little sis.

You have my heart. Your big sister.

I’m a Warrior, Not A Worrier!

I am a warrior 3

Today my friend’s situation reminded me of the need for this card. There are a bunch of things pressing in on me and my brain is in a tizzy (southern expression for going crazy). 

 

*I’m trying to get a seat belt installed before heading south. I had to cut it because my son became entangled in it, it retracted, and there was no other way to get him out. My auto tech guy had torn my van apart in order to access where it has to be installed, only to find out that I received the wrong seat belt from the dealer where I’d ordered it.

I’m crunched for time here. The seat belt cost $100 and now I have to drive 20 minutes to return it. And order another one, which would come in next Tuesday or Wednesday! Or try to find one. Have I mentioned I’m crunched for time?

 

*I may need new tires too because mine aren’t grabbing all that well in the snow. AND it’s supposed to snow/sleet on the day we are scheduled to leave. Ugh!

 

*I am working tonight, and while that is generally a fun time, I have been running for months and just want to be home. Tomorrow is another day of running. I’m getting kind of pooped. And honestly, doing this alone is sometimes overwhelming. 

 

*I have a ton of wrapping to do before I leave. Because I haven’t even been home, this has mounted up. Not to mention the laundry, packing for a week, dishes, trying to keep growing teens fed….. I just want to stay home one full day!

 

The list is adding up, besides all the Christmas-y “to dos” that are the usual. Programs, gifts, decorating, and such. 

 

SO I am practicing what I write about. I am taking a deep breath. I am trusting that things will all be finished, and I am believing that my Father has it all under control. 

 

I do NOT want worry to steal from this most miraculous season. Last night I was crabby with my kids. That’s not how I want to spend the next week! I want to celebrate this season by relishing in each precious moment with my children and my family. These times pass so very quickly, and honestly, people are what it’s all about. 

 

I’m also looking for alternative solutions:

I can wrap my presents when I get to my family’s house.

I can stay off of Facebook so I have more time.

I can choose the most important things to do first, instead of doing 6 things at once like I usually do.

And the money? Well I know that will work out. And I am working tonight so that will help. 

 

I know from experience that these things do actually smooth out. So right now?

I am choosing to revive my inner warrior and banish the worrier!

What about you?

merry-christmas-blog-card

 

I am wishing you a very blessed and calm Christmas season. It is fast approaching, and I hope you can enjoy it to the fullest. That is MY plan.

 

Love and blessings and big sparkle hugs!

Mimi

You Are MORE!

 

what-we-believe-about-ourselves

It doesn’t matter what is being said about you.

It doesn’t matter what others think of you.

What matters is what you think of yourself!

And if you believe lies about yourself, then you will act on those lies instead of the truth.

 

Any words that make you seem “less than” the amazing person you were created to be is a LIE!

Those words may come from the chatter in your brain, just regurgitating things you have heard.

They may come from actual people who are small-minded and have their own agenda.

 

But whatever the source, you need to STOP listening to the derogatory lies and begin to speak truth to yourself.

Because when you believe lies, you think small about yourself.

It’s pretty hard to launch out of your comfortable, ho-hum, dream-draining life by thinking small.

You can barely rise to doing those things the world needs from you–your purpose for being here.

 

the-only-thing-that-benefits-from-thinking-small-is-your-comfort-zone

“But I don’t WANT to leave my comfort zone! It’s comfortable.”

Ummm, yeah. And it’s restricting and limiting. (Redundant, I know, going for the effect.)

And leaving your comfort zone is like jumping off the high dive.

 

But don’t you want to be the best you can be?

Don’t you want to realize amazing and wonderful things about yourself–things you never knew?

When we rocket ourselves (because that’s what it takes!) outside of our comfort zone to do those things that our heart really, really longs to do, all kinds of new worlds and information opens up to us! It could become quite an adventure–mine has!

 

And the wonderful thing is that our hearts and spirits become more fulfilled as we begin to venture out and try things our heart is leading us to do.

**Things the lies make us afraid to do.**

 

Lies like:

“I am not smart enough for that.

I could never go in front of people.

I really do not have the “look” required for that.

I don’t have the time for that.

No one needs me.

I’m not qualified.

I’m just a ________.” Oh how I hate that word!

 

The lies (excuses) are limitless.

But so are YOU!!

Limitless.

The only thing holding you back is you.

 

Stop believing lies and restricting the amazing, capable, beautiful person you are!

You CAN do this! I know, because I did.

 

Love and big sparkly hugs!

Passionista

 

I speak from experience!! Seriously!

If you would like to read more, here are some older posts on the subject.

To Dream (when I jumped off the high dive myself!)

The Lies That Bind

The Lies That Bind Magazine Article (a much longer article in more detail)

Start Anew

 

 

 

 

 

I Won!

The only person

Today I defied the compulsion towards People Pleasing!! (A lifetime-long struggle.)

 

Yesterday was grueling for me.

 

I taught reading to reluctant kindergarteners for three hours,

 

went to an appointment,

 

returned home in time to get my son off the bus –his OCD meant he asked every few minutes if we were going to the book fair at his school,

 

took him (which means dragged him) to get a haircut (sensory overload),

 

and then to the book fair because I couldn’t handle another day of his asking,

 

picked up some dinner,

 

rushed home to help my daughter get dressed for her concert (which meant some raised voices because Anxiety Disorder and choir concerts don’t mix, and we also got to add in PMS so it was REAL fun!),

 

rushed to the concert (which was great!),

 

got my too-tired children into bed and myself soon after.

 

 

11-november-i-am-enough

 

This was followed by Monday night Trick-or-Treat which is a little challenging still because being on my feet a long time is difficult with the metal in my ankle (a 4″ plate and nine screws–read about it here),

 

and then Tuesday I climbed a ladder up and down for about 3 hours to clean my gutters of the slimy mess that had plugged them up (remember the ankle?).

 

Sooo, this morning my son woke me at 4 am, and my brain kicked on, of course.

He gets out early today, and I was supposed to work–a first occurence for me since I’ve retired.

I began to worry that something might happen to prevent my sitter from getting there,

and no one would be at home for him to get off the bus (he is special-needs and can’t be home alone),

and I’d be at school, and WHAT WOULD I DO?!!

 

When I got up at 5:45, I felt like a semi had run over me!

 

I have just begun working as an educational consultant at the school I retired from. There are many children struggling to learn to read and to reach grade level, so I am helping with small groups in a kindergarten classroom. I really wanted to stay home and switch work days to tomorrow (I am only working two days a week because of all the other things I do).

 

But what would the teacher I’m helping THINK of me? Would she think I’m some flighty person, unable to keep my committments? Is she depending on me for a specific thing today?

 

self-care-is-love-2

 

I debated for a bit. But chose to take care of myself, regardless of what she thought. I found a way to leave her a message on her classroom phone and told her what I was doing. She messaged me that going in tomorrow was fine. (Really, she is a darling, and a friend, so I know–on this side of 4 a.m.–well kinda, that she would not have thought poorly of me!)

 

So I feel successful today, although a bit pooped.

Celebrations are in order. I did that. I went back to bed. 🙂

 

I hope y’all have a wonderful day, my friends. 

And hopefully not quite as full as mine have been!

Big hugs and sparkles!

Mimi

Be The Light (Guest Post)

6-june-it-is-your-light-that-lights-the-world

 

 

 

I was born to shine

BE THE LIGHT

Social media.

A discussion had taken place on Facebook. A political one (shocker!). And I found myself getting sucked into it.

My engagement in it was minimal, but the effect it was having on me was significant. I allowed it to suck me in, to take me to a place that felt very dark. It left me feeling confused, fearful and isolated.

As I stood there at my kitchen sink, washing up the last of the dinner dishes, I realized that I was giving power to this darkness by permitting it to invade my mind and my spirit.

And that’s when I felt the gentle voice of my Heavenly Father reminding me of the truth. The truth of His sovereignty and what He is calling me to be in this temporary world of mine.

He is calling me to be light.

So, when I was approached by my dear friend Deborah of Salvage Sister and Mister to join the challenge to be the light in the ever growing dark world and confusing world of social media, I didn’t hesitate to say yes!

***During the week of Nov 1-8, 8 bloggers will share their stories and encouragement to be the light in the darkness.***

The purpose of the ‘Be the Light Challenge’ is to encourage~

  • How to share opinions (political or not) in a Godly manner

  • How to guard our hearts and minds

  • How to deal with conflict online

  • Setting limits/boundaries (1 Corinthians 6:12)

  • Encouraging/building others up

  • Fruits of the Spirit

this huge brilliant spectacular light of mine

 

Visit her blog post for the links to other bloggers that are helping us through the darkness. I’m really glad they are doing this.

Perhaps you’d like to shine YOUR light too. Think about it.

Big hugs and sparkles and lotsa LIGHT!!

Mimi

 

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