We pressure ourselves to get the best Christmas gifts for our children. We just want them to be excited and happy. Well, guess what? This teacher tells us that what has mattered most to her students is spending time with their parents. And as a retired teacher, I can vouch for her.
Kids want US! They want our attention. They want us to do fun things with them, simple things. Spending time. Cuddling while watching silly Christmas movies. Popping corn. Sledding. Going for a walk. Reading together. Just being together is so special. Without the phone and laptop between us!!
Make traditions of baking, reading special stories each year, playing board games, telling about their yearly ornaments, helping those in need as a family, remembering favorite happenings during the year, attending seasonal concerts, church services, dinners…. there are many ways to be with your children. If you are completely worn out from shopping, and cranky about spending too much money, you won’t even feel like spending time with them. And to our children, spending time together matters. And it doesn’t cost a thing.
Here’s to a Christmas season FULL of making memories and spending time together, connecting with each other, not the internet.
I designed this card to express how I feel about my children. How about saying these words to your own children? Help them feel like precious treasures. Because when children know that they are amazing and wonderful and CHERISHED, they have a healthy foundation for self-love and courage, and know that they have a safe place supporting them.
On the other hand, please don’t let your child hear that they were a surprise, or a mistake, or an “oopsie”. Those words can damage for life. If you were blessed with a child, however that happened, they are a treasure to be cherished.
Am I always diligent about letting my children know I love them, every single bit? No, of course not! I make mistakes, lose my temper, say things I shouldn’t. But I really try. I want them to know the gift they are to me.
Side note: Does that mean always sacrificing MY needs for theirs? No. I believe that always making them a priority, even over my own needs, teaches entitlement and expectation that the world will revolve around them, which we all know is not true. I model healthy self-love by taking time for myself and doing things that help replenish my spirit and restore my brain so I CAN take care of them better.
So, my friends, won’t you join with me in telling your children that you love them, “every single bit”?
(You can buy this card in myEtsy shopor click on the image to go directly.)
This post was actually drafted in December last year and saved . I decided to post it anyway, although things have changed a bit.
For the last several days, I have really enjoyed reading blogs from some amazingly creative women. Women like me who have children, love to decorate, lead a busy life, and who like to write. Well, I like to write, but don’t feel especially inclined to do it right now, except that this did turn out quite wordy. 🙂
You see, I am just enjoying being. Being in my cozy, tiny home, being with my kids…even though they spend tons of time in the basement doing their own thing. (I grab a hug and kiss every time they adventure upstairs to the bathroom. There’s just something about touching and smelling them…) Oh yes, where was I? Being…a lazy slug, staying inside and looking at the snow. Listening to really good tunes, reading, and ADHD tasking (in case you need a definition, that is where I start one thing, go to another before it’s finished, then another one in the middle of that one, and back to the first–“Oh yeah, I was doing this”–and then on to another). It’s amazing that I get anything accomplished, but surprisingly I do! Ever have times like that? You should see me “doing crafts” or anything that requires paper, glue, glitter, ribbon, etc. Mercy!!
My brain is so full of great ideas, and things I want to do. My big excuse is that my house is so tiny. I know that is not really a good excuse (how about that I feel pretty tired, don’t want to make a mess in the middle of my 400 square foot living space?) but it does pretty much govern my craftiness. Some day I will have a spot to do it all and leave it a mess while in process. I am determined!!
I will start looking for a new home (I currently rent) in May. And, if God does indeed fulfill the desires of my heart, it will have a room I can call my own. 🙂
And until then I will just keep on believin’.
Update: In May of this year-2013- I moved into the house of my dreams. And yes, I do have a room of my own. I love how God loves us!
I really did. To take the kids someplace, just to get outside, away for a while. But my little home is a Christmas Wonderland, and I am quite reluctant to leave it. I guess I’ve made it too cozy, if that’s possible. Well, I guess it’s possible because I don’t want to ever leave.
And guess what? I don’t have to. I am the captain(ess) of this ship, and I decided to dock it for a while and just relax. Remember that word? Re-lax. Not to be confused with “be lax”, which connotes not doing my job. Sometimes relaxing IS my job. (Jump back Jack, lightening is gonna strike!) And lately I’ve become accepting of my desire to do so.
For many years, I ran like crazy. Constantly going, doing, organizing, caring for, working etc. I got pretty worn out. And that was before I adopted children! I still do all of those things, but to a lesser degree. Took me several years to not feel guilty if I decided to read a book all day. I would remind myself that I’d worked really, really hard for over 40 years, and was often still working hard now. So it was ok if I wanted to sit all day. Strange that I’d think I needed to validate my guilty pleasure of reading.
But you see, my mama was always tearing around. In fact my whole family lived a very full, busy, often exhausting calendar. Especially around Christmas. Daddy was a preacher, mama a teacher, and we were all involved in musical programs in school and church. Barely had time to breathe.
So right now, right here, I am soaking up the season. Listening to Christmas music. Delighting in having my children close by. Gazing at the lights. Creating decorations. Enjoying the vintage items surrounding me with their stories of my past and my family. Oh, life is just so good!